English is hard:
Ducky: Holy shit are you okay? It was like you were hit with a poleaxe the way you fell.
Me: Yeah, it’s just cramps, I can’t move for a bit so can you go check on dinner? Also polacks? What are you? Racist?
Ducky: No! A poleaxe! Poleaxe! That big axe thing that knight statue is holding on the shelf.
Me: Oh. I see.
Ducky: Next time that happens it will be like a pollock is hitting you.
Me: That axe thing?
Ducky: No. A fish.